(Source: jimhalpert)

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

Of course I did. I don’t do commando. Lucky for me.

Fair enough. I can respect that. Consider the topic dropped. And whatever you have told me, I will take to the grave.

Mm, about that… I’m actually kind of seeing someone at the moment. Um… I’m really sorry. I guess I probably should have started out with that…

Welp, guess it’s for the best. I’m not supposed to have any real relationship with other human beings anyway. Can’t blame me for trying.

Still wanna catch a bite of spaghetti with me? Or is that off limits?

If I weren’t seeing someone, I wouldn’t hesitate to accept your offer, honestly. So what, you’re only permitted to have relationships with non-humans?

Nah, I don’t think that’s off limits. I’m allowed to have guy friends. And we can have cheesecake for dessert, yeah?

Non-humans? Like mutants and superhumans and stuff? Yeah? Not aliens though. Never aliens. I mean. Psshh, aliens don’t even exist. I totally don’t have relationships with them. Uh… the ‘agency’ anyways doesn’t like us to get touchy feely is all I mean. No best friends, or marriage, or any of that stuff. Acquaintances. Always acquaintances.

Cheesecake? Oh you’re speaking my language pretty fast. Quick learner.

(Source: drawyourguns)

Zaptoids are my GPOY.

(Source: sugar8spice)

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

Very nice. You’re so graceful.

My most embarrassing moment… Well, there was this one time I was on a mission. I was supposed to be undercover, and for god knows what reason, they put me in a dress. I guess they thought I’d blend in better, I don’t know. Anyways, I was trying to keep my attention on the target and my dress snagged on the handle of the door. So when I started running after the guy, it ripped right down the back. Not my greatest hour.

So what is it you really do for a living? You hesitated before you said NYPD.

Did you wear any underwear that day?

Okay. So… I’m not NYPD. And my name’s not actually Robbie. But the thing is, my gang and your gang are currently working out all the details. I don’t know if you guys are cleared yet. And… uh, I can’t actually tell you. Anything. Seriously.

If I do, it’s bad news. I shouldn’t even be telling you this.

What I will tell you is that the second Phil Coulson comes over here and clears some things with Zed, I would love you take you out on a date, Jackie.

Of course I did. I don’t do commando. Lucky for me.

Fair enough. I can respect that. Consider the topic dropped. And whatever you have told me, I will take to the grave.

Mm, about that… I’m actually kind of seeing someone at the moment. Um… I’m really sorry. I guess I probably should have started out with that…

Welp, guess it’s for the best. I’m not supposed to have any real relationship with other human beings anyway. Can’t blame me for trying.

Still wanna catch a bite of spaghetti with me? Or is that off limits?

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

I’d remind them that they only have one life to live, that they’re hurting everyone who loves them, and that it’s the coward’s way out. Not sure that would help matters… Let’s hope I never run into anyone suicidal.

Most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done?

Sounds like Grade-A advice to me! But I’m not expert. I can tell you even with all my ‘feels’ I’m not really suicidal. So it’s not a problem.

Most embarrassing… Okay, well, there was this one time. We had this plate in the office. Totally fragile, meant the world for this whole civilization— er, it was a big deal. You catch my drift. Anyways, so I have to bring it to my boss. And when I go into his office to hand it over, my foot catches on the rug— I go sailing forward! I can’t drop the plate! So I end up landing face first in his crotch.

Zed won’t look me in the eye anymore…

Hm. Alright. Share with the class. Your most embarrassing moment?

Very nice. You’re so graceful.

My most embarrassing moment… Well, there was this one time I was on a mission. I was supposed to be undercover, and for god knows what reason, they put me in a dress. I guess they thought I’d blend in better, I don’t know. Anyways, I was trying to keep my attention on the target and my dress snagged on the handle of the door. So when I started running after the guy, it ripped right down the back. Not my greatest hour.

So what is it you really do for a living? You hesitated before you said NYPD.

Did you wear any underwear that day?

Okay. So… I’m not NYPD. And my name’s not actually Robbie. But the thing is, my gang and your gang are currently working out all the details. I don’t know if you guys are cleared yet. And… uh, I can’t actually tell you. Anything. Seriously.

If I do, it’s bad news. I shouldn’t even be telling you this.

What I will tell you is that the second Phil Coulson comes over here and clears some things with Zed, I would love you take you out on a date, Jackie.

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

So. Many. Feelings.

Oh yeah, Halloween for sure. I’ve got one hell of a raging sweet tooth. Hmmm… If you could be famous for anything of your choice, what would it be?

Sweet tooth. Gotcha.

Oooh, tough question… I’d be famous for finding the cure for cancer. I’d be in the history books forever. If you could meet a historical figure of your choice, who would it be and why?

Kurt Cobain. I want to know if Courtney did it.

If you had 15 seconds to talk to someone about to kill themselves, what would you say to talk them out of it?

I’d remind them that they only have one life to live, that they’re hurting everyone who loves them, and that it’s the coward’s way out. Not sure that would help matters… Let’s hope I never run into anyone suicidal.

Most embarrassing thing you’ve ever done?

Sounds like Grade-A advice to me! But I’m not expert. I can tell you even with all my ‘feels’ I’m not really suicidal. So it’s not a problem.

Most embarrassing… Okay, well, there was this one time. We had this plate in the office. Totally fragile, meant the world for this whole civilization— er, it was a big deal. You catch my drift. Anyways, so I have to bring it to my boss. And when I go into his office to hand it over, my foot catches on the rug— I go sailing forward! I can’t drop the plate! So I end up landing face first in his crotch.

Zed won’t look me in the eye anymore…

Hm. Alright. Share with the class. Your most embarrassing moment?

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

Oh, mhm, I’m sure you are. I’m so glad that you’ve found some music to use as an outlet for your complicated, emotional state.

Blue, definitely. Favorite holiday?

So. Many. Feelings.

Oh yeah, Halloween for sure. I’ve got one hell of a raging sweet tooth. Hmmm… If you could be famous for anything of your choice, what would it be?

Sweet tooth. Gotcha.

Oooh, tough question… I’d be famous for finding the cure for cancer. I’d be in the history books forever. If you could meet a historical figure of your choice, who would it be and why?

Kurt Cobain. I want to know if Courtney did it.

If you had 15 seconds to talk to someone about to kill themselves, what would you say to talk them out of it?

agentwinters:

agentgalaxydefender:

agentwinters:

What, do you not have an imagination? You can think of things to say, I’m sure. But fine, answer for an answer it is. Cheesecake, huh? Not a bad choice. How about… favorite song?

Ooooh, that’s a bit harder. My music taste is livid. Absolutely crazy. I’m trending on Letters From A Thief by Chevelle right now. Good ole’ alternative. Just understands my deep dark feelings you know? I’m such a complicated and emotional guy. Ladies like that, right? I’ve been out of the game for awhile.

Favorite color?

Oh, mhm, I’m sure you are. I’m so glad that you’ve found some music to use as an outlet for your complicated, emotional state.

Blue, definitely. Favorite holiday?

So. Many. Feelings.

Oh yeah, Halloween for sure. I’ve got one hell of a raging sweet tooth. Hmmm… If you could be famous for anything of your choice, what would it be?

stark-enterprises:

agentgalaxydefender:

Tony freakin’ Stark! Awesome! What’s happenin’, man?

Not much dude. Taking some time off from blowing stuff up. Even I need a break.

Well, fuck. That’s disappointing. It’s not a good night in New York until a cop car goes sailing through the air in a burst of Tony madness. But I can understand the low key.

Name’s Radcliff, by the way.